Breaking out of the Box
by Kortnie Frazier
I wasn’t raised in church. I didn’t grow up learning Bible stories or singing worship songs.
I didn’t even attend church until some friends invited me to Bridge Point Fellowship during my sophomore year of high school. I was hesitant in going but upon visiting, I was surprisingly captivated by the joy and fellowship that the members had. I knew immediately that I wanted to call Bridge Point Fellowship home.
I made a decision to make myself available and be there anytime the doors were open. This led to me having the opportunity to work as an intern at Bridge Point Fellowship the summer of my junior year.
When senior year came around, I joined the work program so that I could continue working at the church while finishing high school. Little did I know, this decision would alter the path I was on. The decision to be a part of the work program required me to change my schedule, forcing me into a different lunch than my friends.
I sat with a new group of people at lunch that I unavoidably formed friendships with.
The laughs and conversations that were shared at the lunch table inevitably continued as I began to share my weekends with them. Before I knew it, I was making decisions that I never thought I would have when starting my senior year working for the church.
I was living a double life.
I knew that the two lives couldn’t coexist and that I needed to make a decision.
Unfortunately, I chose the easier path. I completely walked away from church and my faith.
Two years had passed before I didn’t even recognize myself anymore.
In brokenness and humility, I knew I needed saving.
I walked back into church with shame and insecurity following me.
I asked myself, “How could I have done those things if I knew God?”
Overtime, I began to realize the answer to that question:
I didn’t know God, I knew church.
Persistent to not make that same mistake, I decided to go all in.
I started following the process our church pushes:
I dug into my Bible and started learning Who God is.
I got on a Grow Team and started serving our church.
I joined a small group and started connecting with others.
I went to Saturday morning prayer and started interceding.
Naturally, my life started to shift. Despite my efforts to mess up God's plan for my life, He completely restored them and I found myself on staff at Bridge Point Fellowship again in 2018.
I finally felt like I understood who the Lord is and the plans He has for me.
I was working hard to serve our students while feeding my own spirit but surprisingly found myself dry coming into the summer of 2022.
Summer is usually when we see the most life change, healing, and complete surrender in our student ministry. You can imagine my confusion and conviction when my excitement was replaced with indifference.
In humility, I went to the Lord for clarity.
I was doing all the right things.
Why was I feeling empty?
With grace, the Lord spoke to my spirit to help me realize that my life had become a 4-step program to be the best Kortnie I could be.
Read the Bible.
Make time to pray.
Worship.
Serve.
I was doing all the right things with all the wrong motivation.
The Lord didn’t stop there.
He began to deal with me about my view on others who seemed “hyper spiritual”.
He said, “ You’re a spiritual bully. Mocking what you don’t have or understand.”
Through His kindness, I quickly repented and began to search out what I didn’t understand.
The Holy Spirit.
I had made my relationship with the Lord so practical and by doing so was denying part of who He is.
I realized that if I boxed God into the practical, there would be no supernatural.
It’s in the supernatural that God makes a way when there is no way.
It’s in the supernatural that God radically heals, delivers, and restores.
It’s in the supernatural that God does only what He can do.
In my studies on the Holy Spirit, I came across Acts 19:1-6
While Apollos was at Corinth, Paul took the road through the interior and arrived at Ephesus. There he found some disciples and asked them, “Did you receive the Holy Spirit when you believed?” They answered, “No, we have not even heard that there is a Holy Spirit.” So Paul asked, “Then what baptism did you receive?” “John’s baptism,” they replied. Paul said, “John’s baptism was a baptism of repentance. He told the people to believe in the one coming after him, that is, in Jesus.” On hearing this, they were baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus. When Paul placed his hands on them, the Holy Spirit came on them, and they spoke in tongues and prophesied.
There are three baptisms referenced here:
Baptism of blood (salvation).
Baptism of water (water baptism).
Baptism of spirit (Holy Spirit).
I had given my life to Jesus and declared I wanted to be a new creation.
I had been water baptized and washed away the old creation.
…but I never intentionally asked Jesus to baptize me in the Holy Spirit
and empower me to live out my life as a new creation.
I immediately knew the answer to my emptiness rested in the Spirit.
So on June 17, I kneeled in my home and asked Jesus to baptize me in the Holy Spirit.
I already knew that Jesus is who He says He is and the word is true so even though I didn’t feel anything radical, I know that right there in that moment, on my living room floor, my life would be different.
That is what He wants for all of us.
He wants us to be baptized in the blood, confessing our faith in Him and be saved.
He wants us to be baptized in water publicly declaring our faith through water baptism.
And He wants us to be baptized in the spirit, operating in the fullness that we were made for.
If salvation is what you’re looking for,
you only have to confess your faith in Jesus as your Savior.
But as for me, I don’t want to just be saved.
I want to live and operate in the fullness of Christ by allowing the Holy Spirit to equip me.
When we are baptized in the Spirit, we receive power to walk in our new self.
We receive fresh revelation, clear conviction, and new anointing.
We gain access to spiritual gifts that flow through the Holy Spirit.
We are equipped to walk a new life as a new creation in Jesus.
There is a fullness and freedom found through the Holy Spirit.
It is available to all believers, we just have to ask in faith.
Step out in faith and go beyond the practical!
That is where life changes.
